News-ish with Seann Walsh and Mark Simmons
Stand up sensation and TV personality Seann Walsh presents News-ish – an ill-informed round up of the week’s events that makes ‘fake news’ look like the BBC World Service. The in-depth analysis of world events is made all the more surreal by Seann’s co-host, comedian Mark Simmons who brings his own brand of ignorance with features like “I didn’t know that” – a series of common knowledge facts that Mark genuinely finds astonishing. This is a show that aims high and scores hilariously low – think ‘Newsnight meets An idiot Abroad’. With regulars like Celebrity Weather (a gratuitous calling up of Seann’s showbiz mates to ask them what the weather is like where they are) and ‘Village Life’ – a roundup of parochial tedium in Seann’s Mum’s cul-de-sac- News-ish is the perfect antidote to the actual news. With Seann’s infectious humour & Mark’s consummate one-liners, the boys dissect broadsheet and tabloid headlines for your entertainment. Mark’s inability to grasp reality is a rare and always hilarious gift. They both have their own quirky take on the news stories and Seann and Mark’s interpretation of the colourful characters in the public eye.
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Episodes
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Episode 30 - Live from Standon Calling
Wednesday, 8 August 2018
This week’s News-Ish was a very special one; recorded live from Standon Calling! It kicked off with a lovely bit of audience interaction, which was helped by the rain bringing in festival revellers, much to the delight of Seann and Mark. As usual though, Seann’s mum was on the phone to deliver the latest dose of local news, including her visit to the animal hospital, and much, much, much more. Seann and Mark also delved into the problems of Fortnite, and introduced a new feature called ‘Can You Cross Your Legs’. Neither Seann and Mark could cross their legs, and neither could guest Jake Lam...
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Episode 29 - Ken Cheng
Wednesday, 1 August 2018
Seann and Mark discussed aid, National Orgasm Day and death threats. We also got a deeper insight into what it was like growing up with Michael Walsh as your dad and who Mark’s favourite dictators are. On the phone to tell us the weather – although Seann almost didn’t let him – was the very funny Ken Cheng. His choice of song became very topical.
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Episode 28 - Jon Harvey
Wednesday, 25 July 2018
Seann and Mark argued over bikes, the sun, the death penalty and pretty much every topic of conversation. This week’s Local News featured not just Seann’s parents, but a special guest and a whirlwind of a conversation. On the phone as this week’s weather reporter, we had producer, comedian and film fanatic Jon Harvey. Jon told us how he inspired a Tarantino film – wow!
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Episode 27 - Graham Dickson
Wednesday, 11 July 2018
Seann and Mark discussed school teacher crushes, what would happen if Boris Johnson returned to government as Prime Minister and how ‘what’s your favourite colour’ is a key question in any important interview. Graham Dickson was this week’s weather reporter who explained all about his new show ‘Timber’ which is heading to Edinburgh this year.
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Episode 26 - Ed Night
Wednesday, 4 July 2018
Newsish this week saw Seann and Mark talk about machetes, protesting of gay conversion therapy and of course the World Cup! Seann had a lot to say about toy guns and didn’t let Mark say too much about the conflict in South Sudan. As this week’s weather reporter, we had Ed Night who also filled us in on his Edinburgh show for 2018.
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Episode 25 - Athena Kugblenu
Wednesday, 27 June 2018
They have returned! Seann and Mark, as always, provided us with the newest news now. They also brought us World Cup updates, talk of expanding airport runways and tales of farting on a kid’s face. You wouldn’t hear that anywhere else… On the phone to bring us the weather report was the uber funny Athena Kugblenu, who also told us of her upcoming Edinburgh show ‘Follow The Leader’.
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Episode 24 - Sarah Kendall
Thursday, 31 May 2018
This week Seann and Mark discussed the week’s headlines, the dark web and smacking children. We found out that Mark isn’t very good at geography and studied stretching at university, and we of course heard the local gossip from Seann’s mum. To tell us the weather, we heard from the brilliant Sarah Kendall who is going on tour very soon! Make sure you go see ‘One-Seventeen’ for some low-ceiling comedy.
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Episode 23 - Terry Alderton
Wednesday, 9 May 2018
This week’s Newsish was a close call for Seann. He almost didn’t make it 'cos of an issue that pretty much influenced the rest of the show… The guys also discussed Citizen's Inheritance for millennials, relations between Trump and China and what to do if a crocodile nabs one of your limbs. Terry Alderton joined Seann and Mark on the phone for the last section of the show to talk all about Fling Festival and of course the weather.
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Episode 22 - Suzi Ruffell
Wednesday, 2 May 2018
After a what seemed like the longest break ever – Seann and Mark were back! After a catch up on Mark’s ‘horny holiday’ to Cyprus and Seann’s secret project, the guys discussed the week’s headlines. To round up the show we were joined by Suzi Ruffell. Suzi told us all about her upcoming comedy gigs and what the weather was like at London’s South Bank.
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Episode 21 - Angela Barnes
Tuesday, 3 April 2018
Catch up on this week’s Newsish for an update on Seann’s mum’s dog, some anti-flossing propaganda, drunken A&E stories and Seann’s “cousin” Milo joins the guys in studio! To end the show, Angela Barnes told us about her hate for East Londoners and filled us in on the weather where she is. Catch more from Angela by attending her tour! ‘Fortitude’ kicks off in London on April 17th.
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Episode 20 - Simon Evans
Tuesday, 27 March 2018
Catch up on this week’s Newsish to hear Seann and Peter Crouch – oops we mean Mark – get clued up on gender roles, Russia and of course whatever German Rob has on his mind. Seann’s mum couldn’t make it to the show this week, but thank god for Seann’s Dad who told us the sports news in record time… On the phone we spoke to Simon Evans who talked to the boys about his your ‘Genius’ believing in aliens, before giving us an overly informative weather report. Perfect!
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Episode 19 - Marlon Davis
Tuesday, 20 March 2018
This week Seann and Mark discuss Ant McPartlin (how could they not), putting things up private areas and the average height of a Ukrainian woman. Seann’s mum joined in the bum related banter and gave us an update on the family dog. To do the weather report this week, we had Marlon Davis step up to tell us its too cold to leave the house. Agreed…
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Episode 18 - Tez Ilyas
Tuesday, 13 March 2018
Click here to download your favourite news programme from your favourite two comedians. This week Seann and Mark discuss Russia, Nerve Agents and Theresa May's punishment for Putin. With a detailed description of some frogs from Seann's mum and a weather report from comedian Tez Ilyas, who is going on tour this month. For tickets to his gigs, head to tezilyas.com
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Episode 17 - Lucy Porter
Tuesday, 6 March 2018
Seann is back from LA and luckily for you, we have another episode of News-ish for you to download. This week, Seann and Mark discuss Seann’s trip to Courtney Cox’s house, the ludicrous nature of competitive cycling and Mark’s questionable knowledge of Rohypnol. If you’re looking for quality news coverage, do not listen to this episode of News-ish.
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Episode 16 - Bobby Mair
Tuesday, 23 January 2018
Have you ever wanted to be black? Seann Walsh and Mark Simmons attempt to dissect this and other existential questions on this week’s episode of News-ish. Bobby Mair provides the weather report from his living room in Streatham Hill because he wanted to chat about his upcoming tour, Loudly Insecure. Go to www.bobbymair.net for tickets. (It used to be www.bobbymair.com but Bobby forgot to pay for the website… Click at your peril!)
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Episode 15 - Tom Stade
Tuesday, 16 January 2018
Synopsis: If you separated from a partner, would you keep the dog or the house? Seann and Mark delve into this and other pertinent questions on this week’s episode of Newsish. They discuss Ant McPartlin's divorce from his wife, the liquidation of Carillion and frightening carbon dioxide levels. This week's weather report comes from comedian Tom Stade, who is going on tour in March. For tickets, head to http://tomstade.co.uk/live/
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Episode 14 - Stephen Grant
Wednesday, 10 January 2018
New Year, New You! Mark has given up alcohol completely and Seann has given up alcohol… sort of… Welcome to Newsish! In the first show of 2018 your favourite news anchors attempt to muddle through the cabinet reshuffle, an Arsenal footballer filming his laughing gas experience on Snapchat and H&M’s apology for their so-called racist ‘Monkey’ hoodie.
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Episode 13 - Julian Deane
Tuesday, 12 December 2017
Download this episode of Newsish for a very pooey special. If you have a delicate stomach, then this might be one to avoid as this week Seann and Mark cover laxatives, hotel toilets and ‘the runs’… This week’s weather presenter is Julian Deane, oneliner comic and arena veteran!
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Episode 12 - Carl Donnelly
Tuesday, 5 December 2017
Seann and Mark are back with an intellectual analysis of the latest Brexit negotiations. They can’t quite make it over the first hurdle, as neither of them know what DUP stands for… Seann’s mum is back with the latest update on her neighbour’s affair, but Seann’s dad isn’t on the show this week because he popped down the bookies. Classic. A very very hungover Carl Donnelly provides us with the most useless weather report to date. He will not be invited back.
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Episode 11 - Brian Gittins
Tuesday, 28 November 2017
It’s a Royal Wedding Special! In honour of Prince Harry and Meghan Merkel’s engagement, Seann and Mark try to work out who is next in line to the throne. They also hear about Seann’s mum’s neighbour who is having an affair with someone 20 years her junior. This must be the best gossip we’ve had since the show started.
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Episode 10 - Sean McLoughlin
Tuesday, 21 November 2017
Newsish this week saw Mark and Seann talk Naked Attraction, Paul Hollywood, cucumbers and high school romantic dramas that will make your whole body cringe! Seann's mum almost didn't make it onto the show! But fear not, she did. Seann and Mark did a hilarious role play of Local Gossip in the meantime. This week's weather was brought to you by Sean McLoughlin, who also told us some tragic tales from his teen years and how he's now an arena comedian. Oooh..
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Episode 9 - Tania Edwards
Tuesday, 14 November 2017
A jet lagged Seann, sat opposite a caffeine filled Mark made for a very funny show! We learnt that Mark loves Loose Women and is one of the only people in Britain to put a positive spin on Brexit. The weather this week was brought to you by Tania Edwards. Tania didn’t have time for Seann’s temper and Mark’s daytime TV obsession – shock…!
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Episode 8 - Jen Brister
Tuesday, 31 October 2017
This week, Seann and Mark dive head first into the Kevin Spacey headlines. They discuss sex education (can this be abbreviated to Sex Ed?) and teenage erections. It’s a little awkward. They also chat to Seann’s mum about going to Seann’s brother’s house party at the weekend. Spoiler alert: she stayed there until 4am. We were all very impressed. Our weather reporter this week is comedian Jen Brister.
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Episode 7 - Danny Ward
Tuesday, 24 October 2017
If you’re sick and tired of the usual Brexit commentary coming from main stream news establishments then you should not miss this episode of NEWSISH. Seann and Mark spend 3 and a half minutes trying to work out the correct pronunciation of Jean-Claude Juncker and debate what Angela Merkel really does with her time. This is political analysis at its best. Seann’s mum gets excited about being invited to a house party and some girl has been arrested in Wheelbarrow Town for shoplifting. Comedian Dan Ward reports the weather from a Kwik Fit in Stratford.
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Episode 6 - George Lewis
Tuesday, 17 October 2017
Welcome to the 6th instalment of NEWSISH, your weekly news show with Seann Walsh and Mark Simmons. This week, Seann goes on a rant about lending your possessions to friends. Do you ever see those things again? Nope… We didn’t think so! Comedian and presenter George Lewis tells us what the weather is like from a stairwell in Soho.
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Episode 5 - Pete Firman
Tuesday, 10 October 2017
Mark’s had a cup of tea so things are all a little bonkers this week. Far too much caffeine for one comedian. This week, Seann and Mark commemorate World Mental Health Day with a story about Seann’s mate Crazy Dave. They try to work out just how big you have to get to be classed as obese. Do you know how much a gazillion pounds is? Nope, neither do these two… Magician Pete Firman calls up to tell us the weather (and about his lovely builder, Arthur) and Seann’s mum plugs Aunty Shoey’s boat race for one final time.
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Episode 4 - Tom Lucy
Tuesday, 3 October 2017
Are you ready for the fourth instalment of NEWSISH with Seann Walsh and Mark Simmons? This week, Seann and Mark are a little preoccupied with analysing dreams, after speaking to Dream Expert Ian Wallace. As usual, we get the lowdown from Crayford Road, courtesy of Seann’s mum, and a weather report from comedian Tom Lucy.
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Episode 3 - Paul McCaffrey
Tuesday, 26 September 2017
Welcome back to the Newsish Show with Seann Walsh and Mark Simmons on FUBAR Radio. Seann and Mark discuss vicars, robotic sex toys and Kim Jong Un potentially declaring war on Twitter. Download this week’s episode for the usual chaos from Seann’s mum and a weather forecast from comedian, Paul McCaffrey.
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Episode 2 - Jake Lambert 2.0
Tuesday, 19 September 2017
Welcome to News-ish with Seann Walsh and Mark Simmons. In this episode, the guys learn about the difference between hard and soft Brexit (sort of) and they question what items should be kept on top of the fridge. This is hard hitting journalism at its best… Seann’s mum seems to think she has hit the big time in her ‘Local Gossip’ section, so she takes full advantage of her slot by promoting her friend’s charity row down the River Thames in London. Comedian Jake Lambert has another go at presenting the Weather Report for Seann and Mark, after they cut him off rather unceremoniously last week.
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Episode 1 - Jake Lambert
Tuesday, 12 September 2017
Welcome to News-ish with Seann Walsh and Mark Simmons. This is the first episode of the news revolution. Hit play for in depth political analysis, current affairs, insightful interviews and a chin wag with Seann’s mum. Featuring radio virgin and comedian Jake Lambert as this week’s weather correspondent.
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